Jesus was enjoying the Mardi Gras festivities at New Whoreleans, the trendy new whore house in Kansas City Missouri, with his friend, Alligator Steve. Alligator Steve was neitgher an alligator nor named Steve, but he did have terrible eczema. His name was Santiago, but it wasn't a good idea to be Mexican in Kansas City, so he went by Steve.
All of a sudden, Joe, the manager of New Whoreleans, burst into the room bleeding from his gut and shouted, "There's a maniac with a chainsaw killing everyone! AAAHHH!!!" Then, mid-scream, a chainsaw tore through his mid-section from behind. Jesus tossed hooker after hooker at the maniac and he cut through them like a hot knife through a butt.
Alligator Steve ran upstairs to get more hookers, and Jesus was left to defend himself with a pair of nunchucks he'd thrown together with a with a beaded necklace and two dildos. The maniac knew he had the advantage, so he crept up slowly. Jesus let him make the first move, then he dildoed him good. But no matter how hard Jesus dildoed him, it was only a minor annoyance to him.
Finally, the maniac cut off Jesus left arm, his nunchuck arm. Just then, Alligator Steve came back with a hooker under each arm and ... left Jesus to bleed to death in horrible agony.
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