JESUS AND THE CHEESE SANDWICH

Jesus was flying about in his stolen F-16. His plan was to bomb Mexico City, but just as he got there, he got a bad leg cramp. All those long car trips as a child had taught him nothing. So he landed in Mexico City Airport and limped around while people threw money into an upside down sombrero for him.

Then he was invited to dinner by a local family of fourteen. They had a big fiesta with lots of food and beer. It was so much fun that Jesus began to wonder why he’d ever wanted to bomb these wonderful people. But it had to be done.

So the next morning, he headed to the airport. When he got there, he found that his jet had been stolen by some Mexicans or something. Now he was mad, he made a phone call to the Angel Mafia, the only mafia that ain’t afraid to shake down girl scouts and old people.

Within thirty minutes he had his plane back. But he couldn’t afford the cheese sandwich he wanted for lunch. So he flew his jet into the nearest sandwich shop and said, "Gimme a cheese sandwich or I’ll bomb ya!" Sadly, the shop owner only spoke Korean.

After bombing the sandwich shop, he went to search for his cheese sandwich in the nearby village of Juarez. But the only cheese they had didn’t look enough like cheese according to Jesus. So he threw a couple of grenades into the outhouse just to make a mess. Then he bombed a few other major towns, and even a few goat herders with a herd of about forty goats.

Then he headed to France, cheese capital of the world! France gave Jesus a great cheese sandwich, but he bombed them on general principal.