Jesus was sewing a patch over a hole in his Jesus robe in his ridiculously dirty living room in Texas. Normally he wouldn’t have bothered, but this hole was right in front of his crotch and people were starting to complain. He was almost done, when there was a mysterious knock at the door. Jesus opened the door and a mysterious UPS man handed him a mysterious package, and asked him to sign for it for some mysterious reason. Jesus hated writing so much that he took the package and, using his bare ass, tore the mysterious heart out of this mysterious UPS man, which then mysteriously stopped beating.
Jesus threw the package on the floor, turned on “The Price is Right” and went back to his sewing. The package soon started jumping and dancing about. Jesus opened the box, and out popped a baby. The baby jumped up and latched itself onto Jesus’ face, and the umbilical cord went down his throat and started seeking nourishment in Jesus’ stomach, but found nothing but other babies trying to get out for nourishment.
Jesus took this baby outside and was about to put him in the trash when his neighbor, Dr. Phil, came out. So Jesus had to pretend that he and this baby were friends. Dr. Phil asked all kinds of dumbass questions, and all Jesus could come up with was how he found the baby cooling on a windowsill, and how he planned on raising him up to be a good Christian boy who loves his daddy, and hates blacks and Jews. Dr. Phil approved and went inside.
Once the coast was clear, Jesus threw the baby away and went back to his sewing, without ever wondering who had sent him the mysterious baby.
That's what Joseph said! "Who sent us (me and Mary) this mysterious baby?" tk
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